Seasons

I can sit and talk about the importance of the seasons of life all day long. I'm a big believer that each phase of our lives is there for an important reason and that even the best seasons have to come to end. Right now, I'm in one of the most interesting and unexpected seasons I've ever experienced.

After finishing my 7th full summer of camp and 4th year full-time on staff, I've made a brave move. I'm stepping back to part-time.

For years, I have poured out my blood, sweat, and tears into all things Youth Programs. I've worked holidays, weekends, and evenings joyfully. Except for a week or two off here and there, I've given all of myself to the youth we serve and I've loved it.  

But I'm tired. 

I've seen burn out on my horizon for a while now. I really wanted to be the one that could beat it. I wanted to be the one that was unstoppable and indestructible. The one that had enough love and passion to beat burn out. But what I've found, to the surprise of no one, is that I'm human.

My love for the youth and this city hasn't changed. If anything, the little people I work with have been filling me up when it's supposed to be my job to fill them. They've been the ones to tell me I need a break, to take a nap, and to not work so much. They've been the light at the end of the tunnel of spreadsheets and receipts. The students I get to work with are truly great friends to me. I'm blessed to have them in my life and even though I'm stepping back, I can't imagine stepping away from the community of youth who stole my hearts so many years ago. Kids, if you're reading this, I love you and I'm not stepping back because I love you less. If anything, I'm stepping back so I can love you more and better.

What has changed is the weight of the workload. Youth Programs has exploded in the past few years. I have been lucky enough to be a part of it. In a lot of ways, the program has grown beyond my abilities and with a small staff with a lot of turn over, I've been stretched in ways I could have never imagined. I'm thankful for what I've learned wearing every different kind of hat you can wear in a program, for the people I've met, for the experiences I've gained, and to be a part of building something great. But with all of that, I can't continue to support the weight of the program and still be the kind of friend that I want to be to youth in Clarkston.

So, for my own health and sanity and to provide room for the next person or people that can maintain the growth Youth Programs has experienced, I'm stepping back (but not away).

For the past month, I've been trying out a new schedule. I'm catching up on sleep, spending time with friends and family, and making room to do things for me. I am knitting enough to sell what I make which has been a dream I never thought I'd achieve. I'm becoming a better and healthier version of myself while we wait as patiently as we can manage for news of a match from our adoption agency. And I have to admit, I'm loving it!

Part-time life is perfect the season for me right now. Even though I resisted the transition to this season, I truly believe that it's what I needed and it's making room for greater things than I could ever plan or imagine.

Thank you, friends, for all the small and large ways you have supported me through the changing of seasons. I can't wait to see what happens next!